Rocks

We took a couple of days to go camping taking advantage of the rare sunny days that we get here in the Northwest, and just a time to get away from phones, internet, facebook, tv, the noises, family drama. I think that is why I enjoy camping so much..it is sort of an escape for me..where I can leave everything behind..and my mind seems to quiet down enough to really enjoy His creation, and quiet myself down enough to sense His Presence. The place we went is called Gold Basin. We were able to get a campsite right on the river. We were actually the only people in the whole campsite. The only sounds were the river, the birds, the russle of the wind in the trees..and Paco barking at his new surroundings.

The past few months or even longer..something happened to my heart. I allowed things to creep in...things like regret, bitterness, anger, unforgiveness. Instead of looking up..and knowing that God is always in control..that He works everything to our good...I started to focus outward and became very discouraged with the circumstances of my life. I'm sure a lot of it was spiritual..as the enemy tries to get you off track, discouraged..and will use everything that he can, and I was allowing him to win. I was ready to give up on everything. The last morning of our camping trip. I walked down to the river. I sat on a log..and looked out to all the rocks. I love rocks. I collect them..heart-shaped rocks, flat rocks to write my favorite bible verses  on.

Some of my favorite verses in the bible or verses about God being our Rock..! While I was looking out..talking to God about some issues I allowed in my heart..I felt Him saying.."Teri..look at all these rocks...As far as I could see..big ones, small ones..in fact I had been carrying some of them back to camp to collect..and they were heavy..as I would try to carry two, three or four of them back at a time. God gave me this word picture and revealed to me...that I had allowed some rocks into my life, that I was allowing to pile up on some areas of my heart, and not the good ones that I enjoyed collecting. I decided to make a pile of them while sitting on the log. I started naming my rocks..one rock was really heavy..anger! Another rock even heavier..unforgiveness! Then a smaller one..regret! The heaviest one..bitterness..a small one jealousy..! Another one..critical spirit and a few little pebbles of control. I'm not sure exactly when my heart started collecting these rocks, but they were for sure weighing me down..! So I began to pray for God to help me let-go of these dystructive rocks.. for they were getting way too heavy and they hurt. I prayed and asked Him to remove the rocks in my heart that were not pleasing to Him..and I realized by holding on to them..I was only hurting myself, and blocking out the fruit of His Spirit and the joy of His blessings that He was willing to give if only I removed those rocks.

God has had to do this many times in my life..take this heart and make it new. I found out that its not a one time thing, atleast not for me that its a life time process. Sometimes we allow circumstances to trigger those old patterns of carrying our baggage or rocks.There have been many times that He has had to squeeze, heal, and remove the rocks of my heart or like an onion peel back those layers...those places I allowed to become hard. The good thing is..is that I recognized those time a lot faster..and decided to kick down those piles of rocks..and ask Him to remove them.

I love how God can take a river of rocks and teach me a lesson. That day I chose to trade in the rocks that were hardening my heart over to Him, and replace them with the Rock of my salvation..and stand on His Rock..no matter what may come..I will throw off the rocks that kill..and choose the ROCK that heals!

Psalms 18:2-3 "The Lord is my ROCK and my fortress and my deliverer, My God, my rock, in whom I take refuge. My shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold .

Which Lenses do you Wear?

It's been awhile since I've blogged. I've sort of been in a writers block syndrome..but thought I would give it a shot.

Lately I cannot get this image of eye glasses/lenses out of my head. Maybe because my eyes are getting worse..so I made an appointment on Monday..it's been like 4 years since my last eye appointment. But as I've been thinking of glasses lately..and how I at times view things or what sort of glasses/lenses I can try on or wear.."spiritually" speaking through-out my day, this is what I thought of... the different type of glasses/lenses out there..Here are a few that I thought of. Sun-glasses, near-sighted, far-sighted, rose colored glasses, bifocals, trifocals, progressive, designer, 3D, and many other type. Each have their unique purpose..some for fun, some for necessity.

All of us have our stories, our pasts, our hurts, regrets, good times, bad times..trauma..good memories, bad memories..life events, expectations that went south..and these things help shape who we are in a way. But if were not careful..we can put on the lenses of regret..or of trauma...maybe the lenses of hurt, the lens of un-met expectation..and when we look at life through those lenses..our view can become distorted or warped.

Sometimes in life..we can find ourselves trying on such lenses. (or at least I like trying them on..every once in awhile.)The one I try on sometimes is the lens of hurt..when I wear that lens..and see others through the shade of hurt..I can become un-willing to love or to forgive. Then at times I try on the lens of trauma..while wearing that lens..I find myself stuck..unable to move..so then I may try on the lens un-met expectations..through those lens..everyone gets distorted..and then for a moment I wear the lens of regret..which keeps me looking backward. Last...I thought.."Rose-colored glasses.." those can't hurt..and they're so pretty after all..but all those lenses do is to keep me in denial..and I escape reality.

I thought & prayed and asked.."God if you had lenses..what would they be and what would you want me to wear..and I found myself in Galatians 5:22..and these words popped out.."love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control" and then went to Colossi ans 3:12..and these words popped out.."compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, patience, forgiveness, and thankfulness.

It's a daily struggle..choosing what lenses to wear at times and being tempted not to try on.. the lenses of hurt, regret, the lenses of our past... These past months..God took something as simple as glasses..and taught me something. When I try on those lenses I don't see my circumstances, or others in the right light. I see them in the light of self, distorted, warped. But when I put on, "God Lenses"..I see things in a different LIGHT! HIS Light.! When God sees me..what does HE see?..not my past..not my sins, not my shame, not my regrets..HE sees the love of Jesus, set free from the bondage of my sin, the forgiveness of Jesus and the LIGHT of Jesus! So each day, and moment..I'm making the choice..to trade in my lenses for "God lenses:..so I can see clearly without distortion, and to view through the lens of love, forgiveness, kindness, compassion, and goodness.